In 170 days of not drinking the hardest part so far is realizing how flawed I still am. I still make huge mistakes. I still hurt others deeply. I still hurt myself. I still don't know myself.
Sobriety did not fix me.
However sobriety has made me more aware. Sobriety has given me the opportunity to take an honest look at myself. Sobriety has given me the space and energy to work towards becoming the person I want to be. Sobriety has allowed me to take responsibility for the outcomes in my life.
I cannot undo mistakes I have made in the last 20 years. I can't even undo the mistakes I made last week, but I can now admit my mistakes and move forward with these learnings and strive to be better than I was.
I love you.